December & January Upcoming Events

The evening of December 12th

HSM Ski trip coming in January!

Nov 14th Recap....Ignite Series

You can't ignite your relationship with Christ if your actions don't back your beliefs/faith.

In our world following someone just take the click of a button on Twitter or Facebook. You simply read what the person is doing while you lounge on your couch. Following Christ is NOT like following someone on Twitter. A passionate relationship with Christ requires obedient action, not just acknowledging God is God.

James 2 is a challenge to those who say they have faith in God but their actions don't support what they are saying. "even the demons believe and shutter!"-James 2:19

He goes on to give us a great example of a person who's actions back up His belief. Abraham (while not always perfect), had actions that showed He not only acknowledged God as holy, but obeyed Him as well. God told Abraham to offer his only son Isaac as a sacrifice. Isaac, being the one and only son, was also the one in which the entire nation of Israel was supposed to come from. How would God's promise of a great nation be fulfilled if Abraham killed his one and only son??? It didn't matter to Abraham. Although it wasn't fun and didn't make sense, Abraham obeyed God. He believed God would provide a way for everything to be taken care of.

God doesn't always make sense and it isn't always "fun". However, IT IS ALWAYS BENEFICIAL AND REWARDING! God provided a ram for the sacrifice and the nation of Israel became God's chosen people. Abraham is called "God's friend" in the Bible!!! Are your actions matching up with Who you claim to know as Savior? People are always drawn to a flame. Choose to ignite your flame. Check out these three things that could stifle your flame:

1. Empty Confession - "I'm sorry God".... but I continue to do it over and over again. "I'm sorry" is just an excuse.
2. False Compassion- Seeing a need someone has and saying, "How sad!", but never helping the situation.
3. Shallow Conviction- You dabble in sin and don't find yourself hating it. You make an allowance for sin in your life.

Accepting God's gift of salvation is free. Following Him cost everything.
Ignite your relationship with Christ by obeying Him!
You won't be disappointed.

This weekend we will continue the ignite series. We will be looking at John 15 and the story of Samuel and Eli.

Have a great week.

WNC Rescue Mission...this Saturday

This Saturday Nov 20 we will be serving dinner at the WNC Rescue mission in Asheville, NC.

Meet @ BCC @ 1pm..we will return to BCC @ 9pm

We will stop and eat at the Mellow Mushroom on the way back and get dinner, so bring around $10.

Just make sure to download a permission slip @ www.bcsm.org

Myths about Teenagers by Reggie Joiner

Here is a great article by Reggie Joiner on parenting. I am constantly ask how do I build a healthy relationship with my teenager, when they don't want to spend time with me? This is a must read for any parent with teenagers!!!

Myths about Teenagers

BY REGGIE JOINER

Photo by Reggie Joiner

This is the time when most parents begin to feel like their relationship with their children has become a fog. Boundaries and decision making becomes hazy, and there is no clear indicator of how long it will take for the clouds of confusion to lift. It is a complicated season that is accentuated by changing hormones and an ultimate struggle for individual freedom.

There is a tendency for parents to disengage with kids during the teenage years, when they should actually redefine their role, and re-engage. Parents just need to be reminded to stay flexible and use this phase as an opportunity to re-adjust their parenting style. In order to do that, you will have to refuse to buy into certain myths that so many parents believe about their relationship with their teenagers. Here are a few:

Myth: My teenager doesn’t want to spend any time with me.

Reality: They really do want to spend time with you. They just want to spend time with you when they want to spend time with you.

I know it may be hard to believe, but it’s true. According to the Opinion Research Corporation, about 67% of the teens in America want to spend more time with their parents. No. I am not suggesting that they want to spend most of their free time with you. They are teenagers. Just because they may not take the initiative in working on their relationship with you, does not negate that they desire and value a positive relationship with you as a parent. Don’t make the mistake of assuming, when there seems to be a shift of loyalty and attention to other friends, that their relationship with you is not important to them. Don’t take it personally, and choose to believe, that your teenagers need time with you, regardless of how anyone is acting,. And decide that it’s your responsibility as the parent and the adult, to take the initiative to pursue a healthy relationship with them.

Myth: When we spend time together it doesn’t make a difference.

Reality: It will make a difference, but you will rarely see immediate results.

Most counselors will advise parents that their consistent attempts to spend time with their teenagersgive them a needed sense of security and approval. Our problem as parents is that we hope to see some immediate consequence when we spend time with our children. But isn’t that unrealistic? Try to remember when you were a teenager. I know that may be a stretch for some of you. J Did you ever actually say to your mom or dad, “I will treasure the time we spent together today for the rest of my life. It was so meaningful”? Teenagers just don’t do that. You didn’t, and your kids won’t. But it doesn’t mean that something meaningful isn’t happening. The most important moments that have happened with your children were probably the moments that you didn’t feel were important at the time they happened.

Myth: I need to make time a priority with my son/daughter so we can have teachable moments.

Reality: I need to make time a priority with my son/daughter so we can have enjoyable moments.

Think about the relationships you enjoy the most. How much do you like spending time with people who are always trying to teach you something? More than likely, over time you will start avoiding relationships with people who usually have an agenda. It’s just exhausting emotionally. That’s why you tend to build friendships with people you actually enjoy being around. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself a hard question: “Do my children actually enjoy being around me?” Please don’t over analyze this question and get paranoid, or you could over compensate and make things awkward for your kids (like forcing your teenagers to play “go fish” with you tonight). Just relax, and decide you are going to take some time to learn how to enjoy a relationship with your teenager.

Find some common activities that you will both enjoy. Decide it’s okay to make having fun together a priority. Every walk, drive, meal or experience cannot and should not be a teaching moment. You actually stand a better chance of learning together, when you learn how to enjoy being together.

Too many parents give up during the teenage years and buy into these myths. Keep fighting for your relationship so your son or daughter will always know that they were and always will be a priority to you. And one day, probably not until they have children, they will understand how much you really love them.

Have you bought into any of these myths?

Weekend Recap & Sneak peak at next week

November 7 Weekend Recap

This past weekend we finished the ME monster series, here are the highlights

The big idea for the day was how difficult it is when you lose something and don't realize you've lost it.

For many of us the thing that we have lost is our passion for our relationship with God. We have become cold and numb in our passion for Jesus.

How do we lose this passion?

1) Lack of understanding

2) Sin

We fast forwarded through the life of David and looked at two lies that he bought into:

1) It is just one compromise

2) This choice or object will truly satisfy me

We learned through the life of David that there is never just one compromise, more follow. The things we chase will never satisfy us, they only leave us empty and wanting more. The more we are willing to turn our back on God and sin the more numb we become towards Him.

We spent time in Psalm 51 where King David repents of his sin and his relationship with God is restored.

There are three things that David prayed that we talked discussed.

1) Approach God-confess your sin and ask for forgiveness

2) Create in me a pure heart

3) Restore the joy of Your salvation

Sin will always separate us from God, and the more we sin the more numb we become. May God continue to help us live out these prayers on daily basis.

Here is a sneak peak at next week

This week @ HSM & upcoming events

BHS students FCA happens tomorrow morning @ 7:30 in Mr McDaris' Room

This weekend we will be continuing the ME MONSTER series on serving others.

Upcoming Events

Saturday Nov 20 we will be serving dinner at the WNC Rescue mission in Asheville, NC. We will stop on the way back and get dinner, so bring around $10. Just make sure to download a permission slip @ www.bcsm.org

January 28-30, 2011

Middle & High School Girls will be going to Atlanta to the Revolve tour. Cost and more info coming soon!

Connection Problems

This summer our family went on vacation to the beach. The hotel that we were staying at had wireless internet. The only problem was that you had to enter this 10 digit code every time you logged on. The first of the week I was always looking for the sheet of paper with the code on it. A funny thing happened by the end of the week I didn't need to look at the code anymore I had it memorized. At first this was fun that I had memorized a long number so quickly then I started to think, why don't I memorize scripture like that? What was difficult about my answer to that question is I didn't have any good excuses. It just came down to time and effort. Coming back from vacation I came back with a strong desire to start being more intentional with my time with God and specifically memorizing scripture. Why is it that we struggle so much in spending time with God?

If I where to ask you these three questions what would your answers be?

How much time weekly do you spend reading the Bible?

What was the last scripture you memorized? Could you repeat it?

Do you bring your Bible with you to church on Sunday?

The more people I talk to the more I am convinced that this is an area of weakness for teens. Who are we kidding? It is a struggle for adults as well. The cultural norm is to not spend time reading His word. We rarely memorize scripture and almost never bring the Bible with to church. We have tons of excuses like we are busy and it can be hard to understand the Bible. I guess our excuse for not bringing our Bible to church with us is that it is just to heavy or we are to cool to be seen holding a Bible? I know that times have changed and your can read the scripture on the screens and but it is saddening to me that we are missing out of connecting with God on a daily basis.

How much of what you have learned about God have you learned for yourself? What I mean is, what truths have you discovered in your personal time with God by yourself? Not the ones you read in a devotional book or heard taught by your pastor.

This is an area that I want to see the change within HSM (high school ministry) I want high school students to start being passionate about connecting with God. Honestly we are without excuse it is just a matter of wanting to connect with God. He has given us everything that we need.

Where do you get started?

1) Get a Bible you are comfortable with. Meaning an easy to read translation. I would recommend the Life Application Student Version in the New Living Translation. FCA also has a great Bible it puts out yearly

2) Develop a plan. This is where the struggle begins. When during my day do I find the time. I believe for teens there are two options that seem to have some success. (1) First thing in the morning get up a read (2) My personal favorite...In the evening BEFORE you start your homework or starting watching TV or playing on the computer. (3) Find an attainable reading plan. (4) Ask for help from your mom or dad or youth leader

3) Choose a few verses that are short and try memorizing them. Write them on index cards and put them on your mirror, in your car.

3) Get someone to help you with it that has already developed the habit. Another helpful thing to do is get a group of friends to commit to the same type of plan and do it together.